Bogieblog

Progress Report with Lila 2/22/2025

Since late January, Lila (easier and faster to type than Delilah - and I go between both names) has had pretty much free reign of the house, with my shutting the gate only for about 15 minutes while she ate her wet food downstairs morning and evening (to keep the other two cats from disturbing her). She was still hiding in the basement during the day, then coming upstairs at night. On the evening of 2/19/25, I closed the gate so she couldn’t go back downstairs (2 litter boxes are now placed in the front bedroom). This act wasn't about Lila, it was about my needing to open the basement door to the garage to let the pellet stove warm it up so I didn't risk frozen FHW pipes out there.

The morning of 2/20/25 she was confused and wouldn’t eat her wet food upstairs. She was very vocal trying to get me to understand she wanted me to open the gate shortly after breakfast so she could go downstairs. She probably thought I was a very stupid human as I ignored her. She then decided the safe place was under the printer stand in the office. While I was working in the office that morning, she started rubbing against my legs. After a while, I reached down and she allowed me to pet her along her tail and back for the first time. She allowed that as long as she was under my legs until she decided to retire for the day under the printer stand.

The trend has continued since then, including trying to get me to open the gate in the morning, but on 2/21/25, she started eating her wet food (she always had access to kibble 24/7). Rainey has been respectful of her food, as long as Lila is sitting there eating. Lila has also popped her head up on the couch a couple of times while I am there at night. She jumped up once on the far corner, but decided that wasn’t for her at that time (Rainey was laying on my legs – don’t know if that has anything to do with her decision).

She and Rainey get a good game of tag going a couple of times a day. Spot just ignores her most of the time. I've only heard a couple of soft hisses - where someone got too rambunctious during play. However, those hisses were soft, so just a warning, not a "I'm really mad and you better watch out" type thing. None of the rambunctiousness between Lila and Rainey gets nearly to the level that Spot and Rainey will get into occasionally (where Spot becomes over-domineering to her sister - those two are not "bonded" and will have their little tiffs). It's really kind of funny that Lila has chosen Rainey, who is very reserved, to be who she flirts and plays with. I think it helps Rainey since Lila is more cat-centric and not pushy or domineering, just wanting to be friendly.

Picture from evening of 2/16/2025 - before making the basement a cat-free zone.

Because I don't really have anything of content to write about, besides NH is in an active weather pattern that is bringing snow every couple of days with enough to actually use the snow blower, here are some pic of Delilah on the main floor of the house. She is fascinated with Ziva and some evenings spends inordinate amount of time looking at him. She doesn't try to jump up, but has done a stretch a couple of times (the stand is too high for her to be able to reach). Interestingly, she doesn't get on top of the battery backup to the stove (the black and gray unit behind Lila in the last 3 pics).

The first 3 pics were taken on 1/31/25 and the last one on 2/04/25

At night she also spends a lot of time just watching me sleep - or at least every time I wake up, she seems to be on the pellet stove pad keeping warm and watching me. During the day, she ghosts back downstairs and stays hidden. In the last couple of days I have plugged up her main hiding spot, under a pallet of pellets, so now I'm trying to figure out where she goes as an alternate. 

Unfortunately, she is a smart kitty, and figured out a long time ago the sound of the cams moving means "something". So, most times she moves slowly enough that they don't sense the motion to the sides. No videos are captured until she comes into the main view of the cams, so I only see her out by the food or going up the stairs. I get way more pics of Rainey and Spot running around down there exploring :D

More Freedom

Since getting back from my second trip to Kansas in a month's time, Lila's progress has stalled. It seemed to pull back some in various little ways. She wasn't really interested in eating while I was downstairs (which used to be our quiet time together) and at the same time, she wasn't interested in testing her boundaries with me by walking back and forth around me. In fact, she would disappear and end up being on/around the stairs where I couldn't see her in person.

She did still come up to the top of the stairs and watch what was going on, but her presents was a bit on the coy side. Although understandable that she would have a set back from the pet sitter (again, for the 2nd time in a month), I felt something else was going on. After cogitating about it for a bit, I came to a realization.

SHE has been the one that has been asked to be brave and take leaps of faith along this whole process. And to this point, she has done well. But I needed to shake things up because it seems the situation was more her testing me at this point, and I was not progressing to her satisfaction (yes, a bit of anthropomorphism).

So, I had to take a leap of faith of my own.

Earlier this week I opened the gate when I was ready to retire for the night. This would give her time to do a little exploring while I wasn't watching and the house was as quiet as it gets. No, I would have no idea where she was. Yes there was a chance that she, Spot and Rainey would tangle (however, the two sisters are pretty blase' about her now so I figured that was unlikely)

That seemed to go well. In fact I could hear her playing with a toilet paper roll over by the bird cage for a while. She also returned to the top of the stairs when it was time for breakfast the next morning. I did close the gate after she had retired for the morning (she still goes and hides from about 6:30 am until 2-3 pm), just to keep the sisters from going downstairs to often. The next day I left the gate open longer in the morning, and before she retired, Lila came and visited me in the office while I was working (I start at 6am). Since then, I have kept the gate open pretty much all the time.

If she becomes overwhelmed or is nervous, the top of the stairs is still her favorite place. Even with the gate open she deems it as a safe place. If Rainey becomes overly pushy, Lila will scamper down the stairs, which satisfies the grumpy one. I did shut the gate while I was gone for Jury Duty instruction yesterday since I wouldn't be there to keep tabs (and Lila was safely tucked away down there for the day at that point). Imagine my surprise when I got home and Spot was waiting for me to open the gate that she was trapped behind. Reviewing the basement cams, Spot was very active down there and on the stairs throughout the day - probably trying to figure out why I would do that to her - LOL.

So, my leap of faith has gone well. Although Lila is still ghosty, she appears to be happier and is becoming more confident. She will spend time laying under the futon while I am there. She is exploring, but not getting into trouble and the two sisters don't seem to mind overly much - all without the tension that was evident when I was caring for Big Boy.

So, with her expanded range and confidence, Lila's name has been adjusted. For some reason, "Lila" never just rolled off the tongue for me and it seemed a bit, well, incomplete. However, Delilah seems to be more appropriate and natural.

I Do Stil Have Other Pets

I've posted a lot about Lila lately, but rest assured, the other feathered and furred family members are loved and doing well. All pictures taken 1/03/2025

Spot hanging out in the cage, getting full effect from the pellet stove's air stream. The lower cage doors are open, she went in of her own choosing and can leave at any time.

Rainey taking advantage of the warmth I left from when I was sitting there reading. The pillow she is under is used for the small of my back. She has figured out how to pull it over on top of herself.

Ziva, doing Ziva things

Starting the New Year out Right

Way to start the year Lila! Two important milestones were accomplished on the first day of 2025.

• The first is that she didn't just eat until the food was all gone before interacting with me.
• The second was, twice, she turned her back to me while eating. Neither time was for long, but it is showing more trust. Note the time differences between the two snips off the cams - she took a break between each time to wind around the area I was sitting in. And, I see I placed them in reverse order but I'm too lazy to correct that :)

Then, on January 3, 2025, Lila did not immediately run all the way down the stairs after I opened the gate to bring down her dinner.

 

While I was Away

I left early Monday Morning to visit family for the holidays and got back home 2am Saturday. My pet sitter only ever saw or heard Ziva (the cockatiel). Of course she could tell the cats were fine because food was disappearing and litter boxes needed cleaned.

With the cat cams in the basement, I could observe Lila while I was away. She took hours to come out for food at first (as she did when I first took her in). Then by Thursday night she came out to eat within 15 minutes after the pet sitter left. She also only came up the stairs at night the first 2 nights, then she quit doing that, although she would sit at the bottom of the stairs looking up.

I was home for less than couple of minutes and Spot was rubbing all over me as I was unpacking. Rainey took less than 10 minutes, although she was a bit spooky trying to make sure it was me and not an imposter. Then Lila made herself known by meowing in the basement shortly after.

I was nervous that my 5 days away would be a big setback for Lila and my relationship building, but that does not seem to be the case. Even at breakfast time (3:30am) on Saturday, she showed herself and came within a few feet. She waited at the top of the stops as I fixed their dinners last night, and then overnight she let me know she was up there several times as she would call out to me for a couple of minutes each time (not a big deal, I don't sleep continuously most nights anyway).

Lila wants so much to be my friend, and be part of the household. We will get there eventually.

Visiting my family was great, as usual. Well, it would have been better if my Dad wasn't experiencing advancement with his Alzheimer's. IDK what the clinical evaluation is officially, but I would say he was in the severe stage. But, we have known for years that this time would come. Doesn't make it easier - just makes it sadly expected.

Bravery and Nervousness All Rolled Into Dinner

Lila is actively working past her mistrust and nervousness. I am so proud of how she pushes herself.

Here is a video of 4 clips during dinner time yesterday (12/13/24). During the 3rd & 4th parts, she wants to approach me, but is also testing me to see if I try to grab (or maybe hit) her. You can't hear it, but in the 3rd clip, she is purring (and you can see her getting close to making biscuits). Her purring is for 2 reasons; she is happy with a full belly, and she is self-soothing thru her nervousness of what she is attempting.

Sorry about the light going on and off, which makes some in color and some in black and white - I have the light overhead set to motion detection and it isn't super sensitive.

At the end of the last clip, I got up and left. Her going over by the pellets was a sure sign that she had had about enough of being brave and she was ready to hit her hidy hole. Once I left, she was all good - she spends most of the night and until a couple of hours after breakfast time out and about in the basement and on the stairs.

 

 

Starting December on a Good Note

Lila is making giant strides since just yesterday. At last nights feeding, she sat up by the pellets in a much more relaxed position than the day before. She even came to just outside of the pellets while I sat there for a few minutes. The pictures didn't come out great - trying to be discreet and move slowly while taking pics over my shoulder and zooming doesn't work well - LOL

Later, I sat by the main floor stove and read for a bit and she came up to the second step. She was there for the 30 minutes or so I sat there. It was great that Spot and Rainey were rubbing against me the whole time getting pets while she watched and learned I wasn't a threat.

Then this morning she came out to eat while I was sitting there!!! I was sneaking pics until I checked the cam and realized I could take a screen shot to capture the moment.

 

A Real Life Sighting

I went down yesterday afternoon (11/29/24) to feed Lila, I figured I would sit for a couple of minutes and see if she would come out. Once I set the food down, I sat down on the floor about 7-8' away (can't get much further than that). I turned so my side was to the food and her hiding place.

We meowed back and forth for several minutes while I was checking FB on my phone and I could hear her shifting, but didn't see her. Shortly after the automatic light went off (it shuts off after 5 minutes), and not wanting to push it, I was about to stand up. I moved my hand to balance myself (so I could get up slowly instead of as quickly as I normally would), the light came on. I thought to look over in the corner, and I could see her eyes back at the wall, next to the pellets.

I decided to stay for a few more minutes, still angled away from her. Hearing more shifting, I took a peek and saw she had moved up to the front of the pallet of pellets.

Later that evening I sat by the P43 (back against the stove/kitchen wall) and she came up the stairs, stopping just a couple of steps down. I sat there and read for a few minutes (10-15) and we talked back and forth. Rainey and Spot were keeping my company so she got to see me pet them. Spot and Rainey weren’t pleased and hissed at her a couple of times, but she stayed there watching everything.

When I fed her this morning (11/30), she didn’t hide all the way away – she stayed in that spot in the picture.

Getting Bolder

Update 11/29/24: Finally was able to upload the picture of where I got eyes on Lila. Hasn't happened since that day, but it is always one step forward, one step back - repeated until she finally takes two steps forward.

Just before retiring for the night on 11/24/24, I opened the gate at the stairs since Lila has been coming up the stairs every (early) morning and meowing (I meow back). According to the cam, she came up the stairs once or twice but only to about 2/3 of the way up. Monday night (10/25/24) I left the gate open again and she came up all the way. She did venture up to inside the kitchen for a little bit (unsure if she got further). Rainey was not pleased and hissed/growled a few times (as expected). When I got up at 2:20 am, she scooted back down the stairs as soon as she heard me rolling off the couch.

I closed the gate at that point (lightly, not latched). When I went down to feed her, about 3:20 am, she meowed to me from the pallet by the drier. I meowed back several times and she came out and showed herself behind the baby gate that sits there (it just leans against the pellets for storage. (If I can ever get Typepad to act correctly, I will insert a picture to show where I mean)

She stayed at the wall but did not move when we met eyes and we meowed a couple of times to each other. I finished with the feeding/watering and came upstairs (closing the gate gently). By the time I checked the nearby  cam, she was eating.

It seems much longer than a month, but we started this journey on 10/24/24. We still have a long way to go and there will be plenty of what seem to be setbacks during that time. But truly feral cats are whole nother thing from socialized street cats that you sometimes read about.

This graphic is for new cats that have been around humans, not feral cats

Oh, and Spot has figured out how to get downstairs thru the "windows" between the stairs and living room. I did block them off for a week or so after she figured it out (and broke a figurine by knocking it out of the way), but now leave them open. Spot will go down there during the day for a few minutes the come back up. At that time, Lila is holed up so they never cross paths but do get each other's scents.

 

 

Note: This post was delayed because, you guessed it, pictures would not upload. Oh, they would get uploaded by the insert image widget (1/2 the time), but when I told Typepad to "insert", there was absolutely no response, It acted like I had cancelled the request. Over, and over and over again. I finally gave up in disgust, so the post is a bit lacking